Toddlers are little people with big feelings who don’t always have the right words. As a parent, you play a significant role in the natural way your child learns and develops. Communicating with your toddler allows them to express and practise managing their feelings.

You can also help your toddler recognise their feelings and why they feel that way. However, it’s a major issue for most parents because their toddlers could always be cranky. To better communicate with your toddler, you need to understand their feelings. 

Understanding your toddler's feelings as a Nigerian Parent

While this can be challenging, you must understand your toddler. Your toddler is going through lots of emotions while learning about other people’s feelings. Tantrums are normal because children often don’t know how to put words to ‘big’ emotions like frustration, anger, embarrassment, guilt and shame.

Your toddler is also starting to understand how their behaviour affects you and how your behaviour affects them. They won’t have as much separation anxiety and might not get upset when you leave them.

How do toddlers speak? 

Around age 2, your toddler might be able to use sentences of 2-3 words and say ‘I’, ‘you’ and ‘me’. They’ll learn and use lots of words.

Your child can use sentences of 3-5 words or even more at three years. They’ll start learning how to take turns when speaking and might be able to have a short conversation with you.

Your child is learning to talk about things that have happened during the day. Communicating with your toddler is a two-way street. With your help, they might be able to put things to make a simple story – for example, when they say, ‘I shop.’ You can say, ‘And what did you do at the shop?’ They may reply with, ‘Buy milk.’  

By age 3, they might be able to tell a simple ‘made-up’ story based on their experiences, but it will probably be short. The trick here is to engrave them appropriately. It helps shapes their speech. 

Your toddler and thinking

Your toddler’s feelings develop from everything they learn daily. Your child is starting to understand concepts like time and opposites. For example, big or small and day or night. 

They’ll also start to point to body parts based on what they do, sort objects, and match shapes and colours. And they’re starting to remember what some things look like. For example, apples look red and round. 

Your child solves problems by trying things out. This is why they might pull a tantrum if you try to stop them. Take it easy and communicate with them when they want to try dangerous activities around the house. 

Playing and learning

Playtime is essential because it’s how your child learns. Your child will enjoy playing with others, playing dress-ups, having tea parties, painting with their fingers or a brush, and playing ‘rough and tumble.'

When they play with you or other children, you might find your child is improving at taking turns. Sometimes, they can go overboard; tune them down by communicating effectively. 

How to engage your toddler in everyday skills 

Around this time, your child is excited to do more things. They can wash their hands, try to scrub during bathtime, feed and get dressed. However, they’re probably better at removing clothes than putting them on! They’ll still learn, so you will need to help them.

You can build your child’s confidence by letting them help you around the house with chores like sweeping or dusting. They’ll feel proud when they help around. Most times, they feel like a grown up.  

Controlling your toddler's movement

Your toddler can run and will probably fall less. They’ll start walking up and down the stairs independently but sometimes use the rail for balance. They’re now better at throwing overarm, kicking and catching a ball, and might even stand on one foot for a few seconds.

They feel reassured and safe if you’re around while they explore. This helps your child build confidence to try new things and explore independently. With your child so active, it’s a good idea to look at how you can make your home safe for them to move around.

At this age, your toddler might also:

Jump on the spot

Ride a tricycle

Recognise objects and name them

Use one foot and then the other foot when walking upstairs

Helping your toddler's development at 2-3 years

Here are some simple things you can do to help your child’s development at this age:

Allow your child to play with others: Playing is a great way to make friends and learn how to relate with other children. But don’t expect sharing and taking turns yet; toddlers still think everything belongs to them.

Encourage everyday skills like using a spoon and putting on shoes: These skills involve small and big muscle movements and your toddler’s ability to think about what they're doing.

Talk with your toddler: Naming and talking about everyday things like body parts, toys, and household items like spoons or chairs helps develop your child’s language skills. At this age, you can teach your child that a ‘chair’ can be a ‘big chair’, ‘red chair’ or even a ‘big red chair.'

Give meaning to your child’s speech by listening and talking to them: If your toddler says, ‘Mama milk’, you reply by saying, ‘You want mum to get you some milk?’ This form of communication also makes your child feel valued and loved.

Read to your toddler: You can encourage your child’s speech and imagination by reading together, telling stories, singing songs and reciting nursery rhymes.

Do some cooking with your child: This helps your toddler get interested in healthy food, learning new words, and becoming familiar with maths concepts like ‘half’, ‘1 teaspoon’ or ‘30 minutes.' You can give them simple things to do, like buttering bread and flipping pancakes.

When your baby becomes a toddler, you become more conscious of what they do and need. They often make tantrums all day, which might tire you out. However, taking out time to understand your toddler will help strengthen your relationship. Always communicate with toddlers; they feel seen and appreciated. Frequent scolding might not do as much good as you think. You got this!